How to Prepare and Give a Talk (a Sermon)

When I was called to serve in a stake high council, I had many opportunities to speak during worship services in several nearby congregations.  I'd had plenty of opportunities before, but for this calling, I spoke at a rate of almost once per month.  Once, when I was addressing the Poughkeepsie Ward, where I was assigned to regularly provide support, I shared thoughts on how to give a good talk.  One of my daughters asked me about this today, and I shared my guidelines with her.  I have three:

1. We are only ever successful in teaching truth about God if God does the teaching.  This happens as we speak truth and God testifies of it through the Holy Ghost.  This is why the Gift of the Holy Ghost that we receive after baptism is so important!  We are blessed with the "tongue of angels", as Nephi called it in 2 Nephi 31:14 and 32: 2.  As we read in Doctrine and Covenants 50:17-22, "Verily I say unto you, he that is ordained of me and sent forth to preach the word of truth by the Comforter, in the Spirit of truth, doth he preach it by the Spirit of truth or some other way?  And if it be by some other way it is not of God.  And again, he that receiveth the word of truth, doth he receive it by the Spirit of truth or some other way?  If it be some other way it is not of God.  Therefore, why is it that ye cannot understand and know, that he that receiveth the word by the Spirit of truth receiveth it as it is preached by the Spirit of truth?  Wherefore, he that preacheth and he that receiveth, understand one another, and both are edified and rejoice together."  We can't control how people prepare for and receive our words, but we can give them an opportunity by making sure we speak truth that God will endorse to them.

2. We are likely to succeed in having the Holy Ghost testify of what we're teaching if we rely on the words of prophets for the foundation of our preaching.  This includes ancient scripture, more modern scripture, and the words of living prophets and general authorities.  Once we have an assigned topic, we can research both scripture and general conference talks (or other similar talks by general authorities in other venues) and record quotations from them for reference.  It's better to start by listing many, even though we won't be using all of them by the time we're done.  For modern references, I usually find the most use in material generated in the last few decades, when messages have been shaped more for our time specifically, but there are also highly-applicable statements from 100 or so years ago.  (Side note, in case a member of a bishopric ever sees this: If you are thinking about assigning a GA's talk as the subject for one of your congregants' talks, please don't, because it's really constricting and awkward; instead, assign a topic and suggest that general authority's talk as a prime reference.)

3. As Nephi put it in 1 Nephi 19:23, we should "liken all [prophetic teachings] unto us, that it might be for our profit and learning."  In other words, it's useful to show, through our own personal experiences or that of other people we know, how the truth taught by prophets truly blesses us in practical ways.

As an appendage to guideline #1, I always seek the guidance of the Holy Ghost in knowing what to say not only in the weeks before my talk but continually until the moment I have finished speaking.  I typically take extra notes with the understanding that I'll omit some of them later.  I keep adjusting my to-be-printed notes until I leave to the meetinghouse; and then I adjust my printed notes while seated near the pulpit, waiting for my turn; and then while speaking I do my best to continue listening to God to know what I should and shouldn't say.  I cut out a fair amount of my notes on the spot.  Sometimes I've prepared too much for the time that remains for me in the meeting, or sometimes I've made notes related to favorite ideas of mine but may be less relevant or possibly not fully-established doctrine, and sometimes I just trust God that a good truth just isn't important for the congregation to focus on at the time.  I have omitted more than a page of notes for various reasons as I seek the guidance of the Holy Ghost up to the time I invoke the name of Christ one last time and say, "Amen."

A few other tips: Fasting can also help us draw close to God, and as a member of a high council I realized that I preferred to fast before giving any talk.  I don't always remember to do so these days, but I believe it only helps.  A good night's sleep beforehand is also beneficial for everything we do.  I recommend never starting by mentioning one's assignment to speak, as it simply isn't necessary, and especially to never tell the congregation about one's failure to make timely preparation.  It could be appropriate to mention thoughts one has while preparing.

Incidentally, for me, I generally end up with about a page of notes for every five minutes I'm going to speak.  I also almost never read the talk word for word, with the exception of once when I spoke in Spanish to a Spanish-speaking branch because my ability in that language is very limited.  I may well use the exact wording from my notes at times, because my prepared notes have tailored nuance, but generally I want my talks to sound natural because it's more engaging.

As one more note I believe the same steps to success are applicable for lessons at Church also; the difference is that teachers get class members to participate in each part.

Last thoughts for now:
To summarize, the way to succeed in strengthening people's faith in Christ while giving public discourses is to 1) ensure that we have God teaching the people by testifying of truths we speak through the power of the Holy Ghost, 2) relying on the words of prophets, and 3) providing practical life application and lessons.  I have found great joy in being useful to God and His other children by relying on Him as I preach, and I believe every member of the Church of Jesus Christ with the gift of the tongue of angels can do the same and share in the same joy.

The Joy of Good Things from God

 My family (minus my older daughter, who was working) recently served in a nearby temple by performing several proxy baptisms for our ancestors.

It was good.

I've remarked before that when I've served in the temple in the past, I've never been bored, despite the simple, calm, and repetitive nature of the ordinances we perform there.  This time, I took a moment after we were done, while I was alone, to think about my experience there.  It wasn't much different at all from other occasions in the past; there wasn't anything particularly novel or remarkable about it.  But I did feel good, in a very simple way.

Two of my children received patriarchal blessings recently as well, and one other had done so a little while back.  Afterward, I've encouraged them to think about the experience they had with God as they received those blessings.  It was clear to me, as an observer, that they were each quite moved by how they felt God touching their spirits, and I wanted them to recognize and remember that.

It's easy to not think about it much, or to be distracted by other things, but I think that the simple witness of the Holy Ghost in our lives is fundamentally and crucially important in life and a vital way to acknowledge good things that God gives us.  It's easy to overlook the joy that God gives us through simple and peaceful experiences, but that joy is real.

Last thoughts for now:
I hope to always acknowledge God in my life, and to help others to do so also.  I know that God is good, and He brings goodness to us.

Confessing His Hand and Taking Joy in It

I believe it's important for us to recognize when God acts in our lives--even in small ways.  I'm really not so worried about God's anger, because of course I don't want to anger Him, but I can refer back to Doctrine and Covenants 59:21, which reads, "And in nothing doth man offend God, or against none is his wrath kindled, save those who confess not his hand in all things, and obey not his commandments."  Obedience--sure.  But then we should also be confessing or acknowledging His hand in "all things".

As I was sitting in a friend's ward in Montana this last Sunday, during the administration of the sacrament, I remembered an experience from many years ago.  I'll relate it here:

When my wife and I still lived in Logan, Utah, in a married student ward, I served for a time as the ward choir director.  I enjoy music and I think I was always happy to serve in this calling.  We had a pianist at the time who was very skilled, which was a pleasure.  For one occasion--just a regular sacrament meeting, with no special guests--I prepared to have the choir sing, "Come, O Thou King of Kings".  It was an arrangement like what I've often done with hymns, where we sing them as written in the hymnbook but selectively use some of the parts for some verses or parts of verses and then sing full harmony at other times.

I think I felt reasonably confident about the choir's impending performance as the time approached, but on the day of the performance something strange happened.  We were joined by several people I hadn't ever seen before.  They were roughly about 3-5 men and women I didn't know.  Any Church choir director tends to welcome additions to the choir--more often than not, we feel shorthanded--even if it's the day of the performance, and so I was happy to have people join us.  I assumed they were members of the ward that I didn't know.  I quickly indicated how we were singing the hymn, probably by giving copies of papers that showed the arrangement, and then the choir sang.  It was excellent, and powerful.  When a sister from the ward stood to speak immediately afterward, she began with a compliment to the choir, saying something to the effect of, "Wow; that was really good!"

I don't think I ever saw those people again.  Assuming that they were ward members, I figured I would see them around more, but I think I only ever saw them that one time.  Maybe they were in the ward but didn't attend frequently, maybe some of them were visitors, and maybe I just didn't pay attention to my ward well enough to know everyone who was there, but whoever they were, they were angels that day.  I don't know if someone attending that day needed extra inspiration or if there might have been some particular reason why a great song from the choir would have been needed.  Maybe it was simply a gift from God to brighten all of our lives, and to let us know that He was there and loved us.

Last thoughts for now:

As I reflected on the memory last Sunday, I remembered it with great joy, and I felt that it was simply important for me to recognize and appreciate God acting in my life.  I try to show gratitude to Him frequently in prayer, but I'm sure I still take some things for granted.  Perhaps it is strange to think of something out of the blue that happened almost two decades ago, but even so I believe it's important to recognize the good that God does for us, and to take joy in His love and gifts.

Why People Will Worship with Us on Sundays: Faith in Jesus Christ

I think our focus is often misdirected.

If a person is seated at a table and is brought a variety of good foods, we would expect them to eat heartily, wouldn't we?  We would expect that the person would not merely pick at one or two items, but would make full use of the feast provided.  So, given that the Church of Jesus Christ is a wonderful thing, why do we sometimes hold ourselves back from the many blessings God has to offer us?

There are plenty of baptized disciples of Christ in His restored Church that more obviously hold back.  It's visible to leaders when they don't accept callings and assignments.  It's visible to everyone when they refrain from worshipping together with their congregations on Sundays.  But seeing this obvious sign can lead us to ignore what is actually more important; when we have an opportunity to speak with someone who is less active in the Church, it's easy to simply encourage them to come to Church meetings on Sunday without thinking about why they are choosing not to come.

So why don't people make full use of the Church of Jesus Christ?  It is crucial for us to remember that when any adult (and many children) come to a public worship service on a Sunday it is by their own choice.  Why do people choose to stay home?  Apart from a variety of influencing factors, it ultimately is a matter of faith.

While I was serving as a high councilor in the Newburgh, New York Stake of the Church of Jesus Christ, I began to feel very strongly about faith in Jesus Christ.  I realize that I run the risk of being misunderstood when I use the word "faith".  In fact, during one meeting of the high council--I think it was when the stake president was asking for suggestions about topics for us to speak about in the wards we were to visit throughout the year--I spoke fairly passionately about faith as an important topic, and based on the response I felt that the meaning of what I was saying wasn't appreciated by the rest of the high council.  Perhaps with time I'm able to better express the concern that I feel.

Faith is not mere belief.  Belief is a component of faith, but faith also motivates us to action.  When we have true faith in Jesus Christ, we not only understand on an intellectual level that He served, serves, and will serve in crucial ways to fulfill God's Plan of Happiness for us, but we also make choices to follow Him.  We go out and serve other people in His name, both when asked in a calling or assignment from Church leaders, and also of our own initiative and free will (see Doctrine and Covenants 58:26-28).

While we as regular people have very limited insight, it's safe to say that, generally, when members of the Church of Jesus Christ stop (or never really start) attending sacrament meetings and the rest of our Sunday worship services, such lack of attendance is a sign of weak faith.  Either a new member simply hasn't grown in faith sufficiently, or people who have been members of the Church for many years and who have previously acted with great faith have let that faith dwindle.  It may dwindle to a point where they decide to change their beliefs.  But either way, it's a case where someone should have strong faith so that they can be blessed by following God's counsel but they lack that strong faith.

For several years, I've felt that when we're speaking with other members of the Church, our focus should not be trying to convince them to "come back to Church".  People will come to worship with us when their faith in Christ is strong.  We also shouldn't be waiting until they have stopped showing up on Sundays.  So what should we be asking about and encouraging, and when should we do it?  There will be many opportunities, but perhaps the most important are when we are assigned to minister to others in our ward.  When we visit them in their homes, we should ask them about the basic things that everyone should do to build faith.  We should ask them about their experiences with daily scripture study, both individually and as families.  We should ask them about daily prayer, both individually and as families.  If someone is studying God's word and speaking to Him in prayer, their faith cannot dwindle too much; it must grow.  When it does, a natural consequence will be that they want to participate in the Church more.  They will want to make more use of the feast available to them.

Last thoughts for now:
Of course, it's not off-limits to encourage people to "come to Church", but we really ought to be concerned much more about their overall spiritual welfare than whether or not we see them on Sundays.  The most important things for us to do are those things that help us develop our relationship with God and to build faith in Him and His Son, Jesus Christ, and those things are the most basic actions that many of us have been exhorted to do since we were children.  We need to study scripture daily--especially in the Book of Mormon, given its power in our time and the special purpose God had in preserving it for us--and we need to pray daily.  Even a little bit each day is good; even a single verse of scripture and just a few minutes in prayer are good (though of course we should allow ourselves more of each).  When we want to care for others, we should make use of the power of God's Spirit to encourage them to study scripture daily and to pray daily so that their faith will grow.  When people grow in personal faith it will have a real and meaningful impact in their lives, and in their own time they will return to public worship.

Mistakes of People Who Lose (or Never Had) Faith

There are two types of opponents of the Church of Jesus Christ.  There are some who are former members of the Church who have lost their faith, and there are others who never were members of the Church but who have been told bad things about it and consequently feel a need to combat an evil they perceive.  In either case, they tend to make the same types of mistakes when considering and discussing various aspects of the doctrine, practices, and history of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  We should always remember the second great commandment and show love to everyone, including those who have bad things to say about our religion.  But we needn't make the same mistakes they are making.  After examining many complaints of people who either doubt or aggressively attack the Church of Jesus Christ, I find that each generally falls into one of five categories:

1. Sometimes, the information they present has an element of truth or historic basis, but ignores a lot of other truth and history in order to present a negative view of the Church or its leaders.  Again, sometimes this is done out of ignorance, and I think this happens quite often.  People talk about "doing research" without having done enough research themselves, because what is presented to them appears, at first glance, to be solid and adequate.  In the other cases, it seems clear that much of the history is being ignored because it doesn't support their position.  To be clear, serious historians do have to evaluate the reliability and consistency of various records, and we're not automatically obligated to accept any particular piece of information as fully authoritative and accurate, but there's a difference between questioning the validity of some information and completely disregarding a lot of information.  One example of incomplete information I've encountered was a person complaining about Joseph Smith being taken to court for "treasure digging" while employed by Josiah Stoal/Stowell.  I wasn't inclined to give great heed to the accuser, but I got curious about what the real situation was, so I looked up the court record, which is included in the Joseph Smith papers made available online by the Church; as it turns out, Josiah Stoal originally wanted Joseph to find treasure, but was dissuaded from the effort by Joseph.  The complaint came from a relative, but Josiah Stoal was always happy with Joseph Smith, whom he continued to employ for other work.  The court didn't find Joseph to be at fault.  So while I could have initially assumed something bad about Joseph Smith based on the negative report I heard, after examining information for myself I found nothing to worry about.  As I've listened to multiple faithful latter-day saint scholars it's clear that they are giving unbiased consideration to all available information and that it ends up strengthening their faith in Jesus Christ and His work in our time through His restored Church.

2. Sometimes, the information they present is simply false.  We can't trust everything that everyone claims.  Sometimes people unknowingly pass on bad information, and sometimes they're deliberately lying.  Sometimes they actually think it's okay to lie for what they consider is a righteous cause.  Ironically, I've heard people accuse members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints of practicing something they call "lying for the Lord", which of course is absolutely contrary to what the Church really teaches, and it seems that it is exactly what they are doing in the moment.  I've also heard people claim to be former members of the Church, with the assumption that it lends more credence to their criticism of the Church, and while this is true in some cases, it appears to not be in others; it ends up looking like a complete fabrication after they evince little knowledge about the Church.  There are cases when there may have originally been some truth to a statement, but in the manner of the Telephone Game, after multiple biased retellings it is so distorted that no truth remains.  It doesn't hurt to fact-check people before devoting extensive consideration to their claims.

3. Sometimes, their information is outdated.  Opponents of the Church have been publishing their opposition since before the Church was actually founded.  Some information they present--such as Fawn Brodie's early biography of Joseph Smith or lists of supposed anachronisms in the Book of Mormon--just don't hold up when compared with additional information that has been discovered in the many years since they were written.  It is easy to assume that they're valid without taking into consideration the large amounts of newer information and analysis, but to do so is a mistake.  Scholars who are faithful members of the Church of Jesus Christ do reshape their understandings based on their own and others' new scholarly work.  Granted, by definition, physical evidences alone are never an adequate foundation for faith, but it is pleasing to find multiple discoveries that actually do support the ideas we hold about the Restoration.

4. Sometimes, people make unwarranted assumptions and come to unwarranted conclusions based on unknowns.  There's a lot we don't know about doctrine and history.  Unknowns are the norm in any scientific endeavor; they're why science exists.  Unknowns are also normal in anthropological studies.  There is simply a lot about the past that we don't know.  Scholarly efforts in history and archaeology provide us glimpses and snippets that require some interpretation.  Beyond changing our minds about some ideas, there are others that we just can't formulate with high confidence.  Any scholar should be comfortable with some unknowns, and any disciple of Christ has the privilege of not only revelation but also comfort through the Holy Ghost.  In many cases, we learn things, years down the road, that answer questions we first had much earlier.  For many other questions, we just can't expect to learn the answers during our mortal lives, and that's okay.  We know that God will provide everything we need in order to fulfill our purpose here on Earth and to be prepared for eternity.  One example of this is the translation of the Book of Abraham; there's much we don't know about it--partially because Joseph Smith was murdered.  If he had lived longer, he would have had more opportunities to speak and to write, and we would doubtless have had more explanations about a number of topics.  When we don't have a particular answer, God will tell us, through the Holy Ghost, something along the lines of, "I know you don't have that answer.  I'm glad you want to learn and I know you'll be okay in the meanwhile.  Keep going with what I've already given you; you still have plenty to learn and do that is immediately available."  (Granted, the reassurance is unlikely to be anywhere near that wordy.)  In a related scenario, sometimes there is information available that supports positive ideas about the Church more than negative ideas, but we don't have access to all of it or don't have the analytical background needed to make sense of it all.  Other people succeed in figuring things out, and if we had access to them we would see that there are good answers available, but we don't have access to them (at least yet) and don't yet see that good answers do exist.  This puts us in essentially the same situation as when no answer will ever come before we die.  In all of these cases, faith and seeking revelation from God helps us stay on the right track, but people are subject to influences that undermine our faith and our decisions to seek revelation, and sometimes people allow themselves to be affected by those influences, thus missing out on the best ideas and the comfort that God gives when we have to be left, at least temporarily, with some unknowns.

5. Sometimes people just choose faithless conclusions.  Our evaluation of evidence is always impacted by our choices to exercise or abandon faith.  I love the movie 12 Angry Men (based on a play), in which there is a consensus that a young man accused of murder is obviously guilty based on the available evidence.  Over the course of the film/play, people experience beautiful moments of moral concern and mental reevaluation, and eventually they unanimously declare the young man to be Not Guilty.  The same evidence, when viewed differently, leads them to a different conclusion.  In matters of Church history, practice, and doctrine, sometimes people oversimplify the situation.  Sometimes biased language contributes to this problem.  A person might ask, for example, "Why does the Church hoard money?"  The word "hoard" is chosen instead of "save" only for the sake of putting a pejorative spin on the conversation.  Many people were surprised to learn that the Church had saved so much money from donations.  It is always easy for one person to accuse another of not doing enough good.  The actual financial situation of the Church of Jesus Christ is wonderful; it's great that we're not struggling like we have in the past, that we're keeping the Church running and building more temples, that we're able to do so much good to meet people's material needs on both a local level and also supporting thousands of global relief projects, and that we were able to do so without going broke during a pandemic that caused worldwide financial strain.  It's easy for people to merely accuse without thinking through all of that, but a faithful response allows us to be open to larger realization, and again, to hold to the goodness God provides while we're still thinking through things.

Last thoughts for now:
Everyone has different beliefs in some ways--even within a given religion and even within the Church of Jesus Christ--and it's okay to be unsure about some things.  We should tolerate some uncertainty.  What we should never doubt is what comes to us from God.  He is both wise and loving to the greatest degree, and he wants to give us truth.  We should never let uncertainty undermine our confidence in Him, His Son, and His Spirit.  We should keep learning and allow our beliefs to change at times, but considering all that God gives us, we should never allow our faith in God and in Jesus Christ to be undermined.  We should be aware of faith-damaging mistakes and avoid making them for ourselves.  We should show the greatest love to everyone, including people who do struggle with their faith, and we should help others to build their faith.

Hurt and Tired

I normally try to be positive and inspiring here, saving the wounds for something else.  But I have little else.  My wife listens to me consistently.  I don't have many other outlets.  I wouldn't want to write this elsewhere, because on one hand, when people did respond it would feel like fishing for sympathy, and I don't want to be an emotionally needy sort of person.  I don't want the kind of support-for-the-sake-of-showing-support that I see so much online and in other social contexts.  On the other, when people didn't respond it would be confirmation that they didn't care about things that are deeply personal for me.  But here, I don't expect an audience anyway, so I don't have to worry about people responding or not responding.

I am so tired in some ways.  I am tired of reaching out to people and having them not reach back.  It hurts when people have so many opportunities to demonstrate that they don't care for or about me.  Over, and over, and over again.  It's not that no one ever responds, but the amount of response is discouraging, to say the least.  I keep reaching out to people because I know it's a good thing to do.  People need people and the world is more socially messed up than ever.  But I also just want some people to care about me.  I want to know that there are people out there that I like and who like me in return, and who would voluntarily choose to spend time with me.  It's not as if I never experience this, but it's so little, especially compared to how much I try to reach out to others.

I try to do good things.  It feels like people assign different motives to me at times, and I hate to be misunderstood.  For example, I believe in music, I believe in teaching my children, and I believe that people should share our talents to benefit others, and this leads me to arrange for my family to sing in sacrament meetings.  With many other efforts I feel the same way.  Perhaps there's some arrogance in trying to do anything, but I'm generally keenly aware of my limitations as I attempt any endeavor.  I know that some people appreciate what I do, and yet I also feel that other people think I do it out of pride.  It feels like people support my efforts less because of those false perceived motivations.  And I am so tired from it.

I'm tired of making mistakes, also.  In so many efforts to fulfill obligations and to take on extra tasks simply because I believe they'll be good to do, I've messed up over and over again.  It's not to say that I've had no success, but amid those efforts--whether generally successful or not--I have made error after error.  It stings to realize it, and I somehow often remember those errors years later.

One of my dreams, after retiring from the Army, is to take several weeks worth of food and water and retreat to a cabin in the wilderness somewhere, away from all people and technology.  I would take books.  I would stay there at least until I forget what day it is.

And I feel like I may be tempted to largely withdraw from society in a more permanent sense.  I don't think I could ever really feel comfortable with that.  I know God wants me to serve people--despite my severe limitations--and to receive service from them.  It's pretty much that simple.  I have known it for a long time, and I've had the idea reinforced over and over again.  So I really don't think I could withdraw permanently.

But the idea is appealing.  And maybe by the time I retire from the Army and no longer have a corresponding social obligation I won't have it in me any more to be among people that I hope for real friendship and love from.  When we've been hurt repeatedly over a long time, we just aren't eager to be hurt again.

If anyone does read this, don't worry; I've lived through pain and depression a lot in the past, and I'm not inclined toward harming myself or others.  I'll survive.  I'll be fine.  My faith in my Heavenly Father and my Savior won't be weakened.  If there is anyone who has read other things that I've written here and feels that I've been dishonest before by not expressing this personal sorrow, I apologize, because dishonesty has never been my intention.  Just remember that, just like "in the quiet heart is hidden sorrow that the eye can't see", a heart that is more vocal out of principle can also hold plenty of sorrow.

When I was younger, I remember finding that I liked to ask people what they value, and I asked that they answer in one or two words.  Not necessarily what they value the most, but something they value.  My answer was friendship.  Implicit in that was understanding.  For some time I thought that maybe I didn't need friendship so much any more, but as more years have passed, it's clear that I still want it.

Last thoughts for now:
I should be better at seeking solace from my Savior.  I trust Him implicitly, and I know He loves me.  I just still want to feel love from others, too.  Is that a fault?  I don't know.  Perhaps in five years I'll understand better just how worn out I have been, and maybe it won't be too much.

Thoughts that Stay With Me: "If I Had the Chance to Do It Again..."

(Note: I realized later that I actually did mention this before, on 03 July 2018.  It's actually pretty similar thoughts, including the same quoted scripture, but I'll leave this second post here.  It might be interesting to compare the two posts.)

I tend to easily put things from the past behind me, and I feel like they gather dust on the back shelves of my mind rather quickly.  It seems that other people tend to remember more from their past than I do, whereas I, for better or worse, tend to not think about most of my past.  But from time to time, someone says something, surely without expecting me to find it particularly remarkable, that sticks with me for years and years.

One of these happened around the time my sister got married.  My wife and I were in Utah, and she was able to attend my sister's bridal shower, which was being held at my uncle Dale's house.  I had nothing better to do, so I tagged along to the house but remained apart from the shower activities.  While there, Dale's wife Diane took some time to talk with me.

We must have spoken for a while, and it was probably mostly just getting caught up with each other's recent life events, but I really don't remember anything she said that evening except for one sentence.  I had commented about her children, and made some general remark about how eight children is a lot.  She then responded with the sentence I will never forget.  As well as I can remember, this is what she said:

"If I had the chance to do it again, I'd have them closer together so that I could have more."

Wow.  That was my reaction: wow.  That wasn't what I expected.  I wasn't at all opposed to having children; quite the contrary, really.  I planned on it.  But that expression from her was so different from what I expect from most people.  Even a family with eight children is fairly rare, but to want more?

I once spoke with an old friend who met me and my wife for lunch.  During our conversation then, he told us that he and his wife didn't plan to have children.  It really hurt to hear him say so.  By that time, we'd already had at least one child ourselves, so we knew how joyous it could be.  Additionally, this friend had served as a full-time missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ and knew, at least on some level, that God wants us to raise children.  In the years that have followed, this friend and his wife have had at least one child, and I was glad to hear it.  But I've heard from quite a few others who have expressed similar thoughts about not planning to have children.

From Psalm 127:3-5, "Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.  As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.  Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them".

My wife and I had many discussions over the years about when to have more children.  We didn't always agree, and sometimes had to wait.  We now have six children and have determined that we will have no more.  I accept that everyone has to be done with that period of their life at some point--eventually the mother's "biological clock" runs out even if she wants to keep going--and we reached it after our sixth child was born.  Would I have wanted more, with less space between them?  Yes; I understand now pretty well what my aunt meant.  Am I happy with my children?  So very much.  When responding to others asking how many children I have, I commonly tell them the number and then very honestly add, "And I like each one of them!"  I would encourage everyone who is able to raise children to do so (having married traditionally so that the children could be raised by both a mother and father).

Last thoughts for now:
I'm grateful that my Aunt Diane expressed that thought to me all those years ago.  The world needs encouragement to follow God's will, especially related to such a vital commandment as "multiply, and replenish the earth."  The blessings and joy of parenting are boundless, and God's children, waiting to come to the Earth, need good homes where they will be loved and taught by dedicated parents.  I'm grateful beyond words to be able to raise my children.

The Great Things I Hope For

When singing special musical numbers during sacrament meetings, I am always wary; I want to make sure the focus of the meeting is on Christ and His Gospel, and not on people's musical ability.  That being said, my family apparently received many, many compliments last Sunday after six of us sang "Sleep, Little Jesus" together.

I had a couple of coughing children to take home, so I was able to dodge the acclaim.  And I don't know how much we succeeded in inviting the Holy Ghost more than showing off singing ability; that's hard to tell.  But apparently we sang very well.  People told my wife more than once that day that they love it when our family sings.

What makes that kind of singing possible?  Sure, my wife and I are musically competent, though very far from being as skilled as a professional.  We're not wealthy enough for personal vocal instruction for the kids, though we have been able to get some piano lessons for them.  We definitely did some practicing throughout the week, but the kids have enough musical ability already that we can put together a decent song as a group.  What has brought that about?

If our family being able to sing together is a "great thing", then I think what makes it possible is one of those "small and simple things" (Alma 37:6).  Specifically, we sing together (almost) every night as part of our Family Time tradition I wrote about previously.  Each night we sing a hymn or a children's song--just one song, usually.  Over the years, that little bit of continual practice must have had an effect.  My wife considers us to finally be in the "reward" period, where we get to really enjoy singing together with the children, after years of small efforts.

But that daily singing is the least important part of our Family Time tradition.  While I believe music is important, the more important counsel we're trying to follow is the daily family scripture study and prayer.  If daily singing slowly builds our musical ability so that now we can rejoice in the "great thing" of family musical numbers, what great things will come from our small and simple daily scripture study and prayer?

I'm not sure what those great things will be, but I do believe Alma's words that, "by small and simple things are great things brought to pass".  As I said last time, I think that this simple nightly tradition is the most important thing I do, and I believe that it really will bless my children.

Last thoughts for now:
Daily scripture study and prayer are "small and simple things"; we have promises from the Creator of the Universe that they will bring about great things.  Perhaps the great thing they will bring is a solid faith in Christ that will guide my children throughout their lives.  Maybe it will be the traditions that they carry on with their own families.  Maybe it will include greater ability to meaningfully ponder God's word and to converse with others about it.  Maybe it will be all of that and more.

The Most Important Thing I Do

 A while back, I was sitting in on a class held for United States Military Academy cadets by the Church Educational System's Institute of Religion.  I don't remember what the lesson was that evening, but at some point I was thinking about my family's nightly Family Time tradition.  I wrote a post about this back in October 2013, and we still do largely the same thing almost every night.  Essentially, we sing together, we study scripture together, and we pray together.  Recently, we've also often been reviewing personal goals, and of course, we have an extended Home Evening with a lesson, which we now have on Sundays, following a suggestion from Elder Cook of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles in the October 2018 general conference.  It may seem a simple thing for me, my wife, and my children to take a few minutes for reverence and devotion to God, but as I sat in the Institute class, somehow the thought came to me that Family Time is the most important thing I do.

I hadn't really considered it like that before.  Of course, I know it has been important to me, or I wouldn't have kept up such a tradition for so long.  But when I think about the real, lasting impact of everything I do in life, I don't think anything else will be more important than this simple tradition.  Through it, we're able to learn together and grow spiritually; we're able to provide our children with the knowledge they need to navigate through the trials and confusion of life.  Through it, we find greater unity as a family.  Through it, we remind ourselves daily of how to live as disciples of Christ.

I do other good things in life, whether in Church service, at work, other activities with my family, or just by taking advantage of opportunities when they arise at random, but I don't think the real, lasting impact approaches what I achieve through daily singing, scripture study, and prayer with my family.

It was fascinating to consider.  In the days that have followed, I haven't changed my mind.

Last thoughts for now:
Someday my family will start shrinking as my adult children move out and begin their own lives.  Eventually, we presumably won't have any children remaining at home.  Family Time will be a bit different then as we don't have any children to teach.  In one sense, I think I will have a feeling of, "Mission Accomplished" when that day comes.  I expect that my wife and I will carry on the tradition, but simply focus more on what interests the two of us.  I hope that our children will have similar traditions with their future spouses and children, and I expect that my wife and I will want to join our children's family traditions when possible.  For now, I happily carry on the event each night.  I love it.  And I truly believe that it's the most important thing I do.

Seeking Revelation Leads Us to Unity With God

 A passage I love sharing with others is John 17:20-22.  In John 17, the Savior prayed to the Father (in what we sometimes term the "intercessory prayer), and in verses 20-22 He said this: "Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word; That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me.  And the glory which thou gavest me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one".  It is our Savior's great desire that we, His followers, be one with Him and the Father as they are united.  One of the most important aspects of such unity is submission of our will to that of the Father, modeled by our Redeemer in the Garden of Gethsemane as He said, "not my will, but thine, be done." (Luke 22:42)

Perhaps it seems to be not immediately related at first, but in recent years, President Nelson has put a lot of emphasis on seeking personal revelation.  In the April 2018 general conference, in what I would consider the most profound statement to have been made in the last decade (at least), he said, "in coming days, it will not be possible to survive spiritually without the guiding, directing, comforting, and constant influence of the Holy Ghost.  My beloved brothers and sisters, I plead with you to increase your spiritual capacity to receive revelation."  (from the talk Revelation for the Church, Revelation for Our Lives)  In the general conference that was broadcast less than a month ago, he spoke of the importance of full-time missions work for young people (and the responsibility young men have to serve), and encouraged them to pray about it.  "Pray to know if the Lord would have you serve a mission, and the Holy Ghost will respond to your heart and mind."

He also referred to it as a "decision", because it always is, but encouraged us to pray to know God's will about it.

I remember being encouraged to pray to God about the same thing, and I remember my response.  I don't remember who I was speaking with or what else occurred in that conversation, but the general question was along the lines of "are you going to serve a full-time mission?"  The other person said I should pray about it.  In response, I basically said, "Well, I already know what the answer will be."  I don't think I had as much familiarity with seeking answers to pray at that younger age, but I did recognize that God would give me an answer to my prayer, and in that case I knew what it would be.  But knowing God's will isn't all that we need; the choice remained for me then, and still remains for me now, whether I will choose to do His will.  It is definitely a crucial decision to demonstrate our faith and submissiveness to God through such choices.

As Jesus Christ said, "Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven." (Matthew 7:21)  And as King Benjamin taught, "For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father." (Mosiah 3:19)

Even in merely considering the act of discovering God's will through prayer, I begin making a decision about whether I will follow my own desires or submit to that higher will.  Seeking revelation from God tends to provide us not merely with general knowledge, but especially a knowledge of what we should do.  As we seek and open ourselves to His answers, we find opportunity to follow His will, and thus we make steps toward greater unity with Him and with our Savior, who enables us to repent and become more than we already are.  Earnestly seeking revelation is thus a major part of exaltation.

Last thoughts for now:
I intend for personal revelation to constantly be a part of my life.  There will be times when it will be easier or more difficult in some way for me to do things I know God desires of me, but I know that I can seek God's will through prayer in the name of Christ, and that in doing so I can reform my own will.  I hope to do so often.

The Mistake of Denying Others the Name of Christ

It's a disappointingly popular pastime among a subset of Christianity to take an actively accusatory stance toward the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  So many times I have heard, "Mormons aren't Christian."  They essentially always neglect to use the correct name of the Church, because it starts to sound absurd to say that members of the Church of Jesus Christ aren't Christian.  While it's possibly useful to go point by point and provide explanations to potentially alleviate people's concerns (e.g., reliance exclusively on the Bible can't be a defining aspect of Christianity because the followers of Christ in His time were definitely Christian but the New Testament hadn't even been written yet and the Bible wouldn't exist as a collected volume until several hundred years later), it's also unlikely to be effective because people are already taking a stance of opposing the Church; even the most basic truths are not convincing to someone who doesn't want to hear them.

When I converse with people who are confrontational or antagonistic, I try to change the tone of the conversation.  I try to ask about their beliefs--independent of mine or of the teachings of the Church they have objected to--so that they can start participating in mutual understanding.  I try to have hope of establishing a conversation free from contention.  It still always depends on the other person, too, but sometimes the tone does improve and very good things come of it.

Recently, another thought occurred to me.  Antagonists often cite Christianity while condemning us in a very un-Christian sort of way.  Here's what I expressed to one such person:

"As to whether or not we should judge others, I think there will be a lot of surprise and embarrassment when, standing before Jesus Christ at the day of judgment, some people will hear Him say, 'You treated some of my disciples very poorly.  You tried to deny my name to them.'  Perhaps they might sheepishly respond, 'Well, we thought they weren't good enough.'  He might, in turn, say, 'I was pretty clear that you weren't supposed to judge others.'  Christ's own words ought to give some people great pause.  Yes, as we read in Matthew 7:21-23, there will be those who thought they had done great things in His name only to find out later that He tells them He doesn't know them, and that they must 'depart' from Him.  But consider this: how horrible will it be for those who have judged others to be unworthy of Christ's name, given His words just earlier in that same chapter?  'Judge not, that ye be not judged.  For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.'  How horrible it would be for our Redeemer to say to a person, 'You would have denied my name to others, and now I must deny it to you.'  How horrible it will be when He does have to tell people who professed His name to depart.  I really feel like that's something that should make people reconsider their words about other people's beliefs.

Last thoughts for now:
My faith and my knowledge of God aren't deterred or undone by any critical words from others, but I hope that they're always grounded in Christlike love so that I might be able to serve people who would otherwise call themselves my enemies.  Perhaps I will be able to express my concern about the fate of those who judge in a loving way to those who are being overtly judgmental.  Perhaps it will help.

A Short Series on the Savior of the World, Jesus Christ

 In a recent dialogue I had online, a woman asked about who Jesus Christ was to me and why He is important to me.  I shared a number of scriptural passages I've identified and then also wrote from my own heart.  In these three posts, I have mostly just copied what I provided to that woman.  I would hope that, for anyone who ever reads them, there will be no question about the center of my faith and my daily worship.

Why Jesus Christ is Important to Me

Why is Jesus Christ important to me?  A lot of that is stated in the scriptures I quoted, but I'll do more to phrase it in my own words:

Jesus Christ is my Savior.  I am His disciple through covenant.  I have sinned (like everyone) and of myself I am not worthy to return to my Father in Heaven, but through the power and grace of Jesus Christ I can be perfected in Him and receive all of the blessings that God the Father desires to give His children.  I owe Him everything.  He knows and loves me.  He loves me enough that He suffered for my sins and even died for me.  But He also lived for me and showed the way that I should live, not only to have peace in this life but also afterward, throughout eternity.  Of course I am not the only one He loves; He loves everyone I know and everyone I don't.  He has commanded me to love everyone, after loving God, and I take that commandment very seriously.  I'm grateful that my "loved ones" among my family and friends have salvation available to them also, and that the mercy of Christ is available to the entire world whom I am commanded to love.  Jesus Christ understands my pain in life.  I really don't expect many people on this Earth to have great understanding of the trials I've known, and I don't expect any mortal person to fully understand, but He does.  He knows the depth of my suffering, even when it has been foolishly self-inflicted, and He indeed knows much more suffering than I've ever known.  But He has lived through the lowest of the lows and in His greatest difficulties He still gave His will to the Father.  That is an example of no small importance to me.  In any moment of weakness or trial, I always know that I can submit to my Father's will as He did, and I know that They both want me to do so in order that I might be one with them and know their joy.  I don't expect to achieve that unity during my mortal life; I expect that full obedience to Christ's commandment to "be perfect" is only possible through Him and won't happen while I'm still subject to mortal weakness.  But I still strive to be like Him.  I invoke His name daily in prayer to my Heavenly Father, both individually and with my family.  I teach my family about Him.  While there are many ephemeral things in the world that I enjoy, I continually keep God's eternal Plan of Happiness in my mind, knowing that Jesus Christ is central to every part of that Plan, and no mortal pleasure could ever compare to what He provides me.  I know that at the day of my final judgment I will stand before Him and the Father, and that in His majesty I will have nothing to offer Him, and I will know my own unworthiness keenly, but I have faith that His Atonement not only gives me strength now but will be sufficient for me at that time.

Last thoughts for now:
I should add that I see the marvelous work of God being carried out in the modern Church of Jesus Christ.  It is an immense blessing to have this Church that exists to bring people closer to Him.

Testimonies of Christ from Scripture: The Bible

One of my favorite passages from the Bible (I'll tend to focus on the New Testament) is Luke 7:6-9 (also related in Matthew 8:5-10).  "Now when he had ended all his sayings in the audience of the people, he entered into Capernaum.  And a certain centurion’s servant, who was dear unto him, was sick, and ready to die.  And when he heard of Jesus, he sent unto him the elders of the Jews, beseeching him that he would come and heal his servant.  And when they came to Jesus, they besought him instantly, saying, That he was worthy for whom he should do this: For he loveth our nation, and he hath built us a synagogue.  Then Jesus went with them. And when he was now not far from the house, the centurion sent friends to him, saying unto him, Lord, trouble not thyself: for I am not worthy that thou shouldest enter under my roof: Wherefore neither thought I myself worthy to come unto thee: but say in a word, and my servant shall be healed.  For I also am a man set under authority, having under me soldiers, and I say unto one, Go, and he goeth; and to another, Come, and he cometh; and to my servant, Do this, and he doeth it.  When Jesus heard these things, he marvelled at him, and turned him about, and said unto the people that followed him, I say unto you, I have not found so great faith, no, not in Israel."  I like the respect that the centurion shows toward Jesus, but also the recognition of the Savior's authority over even the physical world around us.

Here are some some passages about Jesus Christ that I've marked in my own Bible during my personal studies:

Matthew 1:21 "And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins."

Revelation 19:16 "And he hath on his vesture and on his thigh a name written, KING OF KINGS, AND LORD OF LORDS."

Isaiah 9:6 "For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace."

Matthew 20:27-28 "And whosoever will be chief among you, let him be your servant: Even as the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many."

John 14:6 "Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me."

Revelation 3:20-21 "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.  To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in his throne."

Romans 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."

John 3:16 "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

John 17:3 "And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent."

1 John 2:3 "And hereby we do know that we know him, if we keep his commandments."

Acts 4:12 "Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved."

Philippians 2:5-6 "Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus: Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God"

Isaiah 49:15-16 "Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.  Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me."

Isaiah 53:3-5 "He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.  Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.  But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed."

1 Peter 4:12-13 "But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy."

Revelation 7:17 "For the Lamb which is in the midst of the throne shall feed them, and shall lead them unto living fountains of waters: and God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes."

Those are all passages that have been particularly meaningful to me in the past.

Last thoughts for now:
I love that scripture tells us how Jesus Christ's teachings and Atonement help us personally.

Testimonies of Christ from Scripture: The Book of Mormon

My favorite Book of Mormon passage about Christ is 2 Nephi 9:21-22.  "And he cometh into the world that he may save all men if they will hearken unto his voice; for behold, he suffereth the pains of all men, yea, the pains of every living creature, both men, women, and children, who belong to the family of Adam.  And he suffereth this that the resurrection might pass upon all men, that all might stand before him at the great and judgment day."  When we stand with Him at the day of our judgment, He will understand all of our pains and difficulties, and He will be in the perfect position to deal with us mercifully.

Though there are many more, here's a list of passages Book of Mormon, in page order, that I've marked in my own set of scriptures over the years:

1 Nephi 13:40 "And the angel spake unto me, saying: These last records...shall make known to all kindreds, tongues, and people, that the Lamb of God is the Son of the Eternal Father, and the Savior of the world; and that all men must come unto him, or they cannot be saved."

2 Nephi 2:8 "Wherefore, how great the importance to make these things known unto the inhabitants of the earth, that they may know that there is no flesh that can dwell in the presence of God, save it be through the merits, and mercy, and grace of the Holy Messiah, who layeth down his life according to the flesh, and taketh it again by the power of the Spirit, that he may bring to pass the resurrection of the dead, being the first that should rise."

2 Nephi 2:26 "And the Messiah cometh in the fulness of time, that he may redeem the children of men from the fall. And because that they are redeemed from the fall they have become free forever, knowing good from evil; to act for themselves and not to be acted upon, save it be by the punishment of the law at the great and last day, according to the commandments which God hath given."

2 Nephi 25:26 "And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins."

2 Nephi 26:24 "He doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world, even that he layeth down his own life that he may draw all men unto him. Wherefore, he commandeth none that they shall not partake of his salvation."

2 Nephi 31:7 "Know ye not that he was holy? But notwithstanding he being holy, he showeth unto the children of men that, according to the flesh he humbleth himself before the Father, and witnesseth unto the Father that he would be obedient unto him in keeping his commandments."

Omni 1:26 "And now, my beloved brethren, I would that ye should come unto Christ, who is the Holy One of Israel, and partake of his salvation, and the power of his redemption. Yea, come unto him, and offer your whole souls as an offering unto him, and continue in fasting and praying, and endure to the end; and as the Lord liveth ye will be saved."

Mosiah 3:7-10 "And lo, he shall suffer temptations, and pain of body, hunger, thirst, and fatigue, even more than man can suffer, except it be unto death; for behold, blood cometh from every pore, so great shall be his anguish for the wickedness and the abominations of his people.  And he shall be called Jesus Christ, the Son of God, the Father of heaven and earth, the Creator of all things from the beginning; and his mother shall be called Mary.  And lo, he cometh unto his own, that salvation might come unto the children of men even through faith on his name; and even after all this they shall consider him a man, and say that he hath a devil, and shall scourge him, and shall crucify him.  And he shall rise the third day from the dead; and behold, he standeth to judge the world; and behold, all these things are done that a righteous judgment might come upon the children of men."

Mosiah 3:17 "And moreover, I say unto you, that there shall be no other name given nor any other way nor means whereby salvation can come unto the children of men, only in and through the name of Christ, the Lord Omnipotent."

Mosiah 15:6-9 "And after all this, after working many mighty miracles among the children of men, he shall be led, yea, even as Isaiah said, as a sheep before the shearer is dumb, so he opened not his mouth.  Yea, even so he shall be led, crucified, and slain, the flesh becoming subject even unto death, the will of the Son being swallowed up in the will of the Father.  And thus God breaketh the bands of death, having gained the victory over death; giving the Son power to make intercession for the children of men— Having ascended into heaven, having the bowels of mercy; being filled with compassion towards the children of men; standing betwixt them and justice; having broken the bands of death, taken upon himself their iniquity and their transgressions, having redeemed them, and satisfied the demands of justice."

Mosiah 16:13 "And now, ought ye not to tremble and repent of your sins, and remember that only in and through Christ ye can be saved?"

Alma 34:8-10 "And now, behold, I will testify unto you of myself that these things are true. Behold, I say unto you, that I do know that Christ shall come among the children of men, to take upon him the transgressions of his people, and that he shall atone for the sins of the world; for the Lord God hath spoken it.  For it is expedient that an atonement should be made; for according to the great plan of the Eternal God there must be an atonement made, or else all mankind must unavoidably perish; yea, all are hardened; yea, all are fallen and are lost, and must perish except it be through the atonement which it is expedient should be made.  For it is expedient that there should be a great and last sacrifice; yea, not a sacrifice of man, neither of beast, neither of any manner of fowl; for it shall not be a human sacrifice; but it must be an infinite and eternal sacrifice."

Alma 34:15-16 "And thus he shall bring salvation to all those who shall believe on his name; this being the intent of this last sacrifice, to bring about the bowels of mercy, which overpowereth justice, and bringeth about means unto men that they may have faith unto repentance.  And thus mercy can satisfy the demands of justice, and encircles them in the arms of safety, while he that exercises no faith unto repentance is exposed to the whole law of the demands of justice; therefore only unto him that has faith unto repentance is brought about the great and eternal plan of redemption."

Helaman 3:27-28 "Thus we may see that the Lord is merciful unto all who will, in the sincerity of their hearts, call upon his holy name. Yea, thus we see that the gate of heaven is open unto all, even to those who will believe on the name of Jesus Christ, who is the Son of God."

Helaman 5:12 "And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall."

3 Nephi 11:10-11 "Behold, I am Jesus Christ, whom the prophets testified shall come into the world.  And behold, I am the light and the life of the world; and I have drunk out of that bitter cup which the Father hath given me, and have glorified the Father in taking upon me the sins of the world, in the which I have suffered the will of the Father in all things from the beginning."

3 Nephi 18:24 "Therefore, hold up your light that it may shine unto the world. Behold I am the light which ye shall hold up—that which ye have seen me do. Behold ye see that I have prayed unto the Father, and ye all have witnessed."

3 Nephi 27:27 "And know ye that ye shall be judges of this people, according to the judgment which I shall give unto you, which shall be just. Therefore, what manner of men ought ye to be? Verily I say unto you, even as I am."

Mormon 7:5 "Know ye that ye must come to the knowledge of your fathers, and repent of all your sins and iniquities, and believe in Jesus Christ, that he is the Son of God, and that he was slain by the Jews, and by the power of the Father he hath risen again, whereby he hath gained the victory over the grave; and also in him is the sting of death swallowed up."

Moroni 10:32 "Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness; and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you, that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ; and if by the grace of God ye are perfect in Christ, ye can in nowise deny the power of God."

Last thoughts for now:
I hope for everyone to study the Book of Mormon and thus be blessed by these and other true and inspiring passages that testify of Jesus Christ.

A "Testimony", or Faith and Knowledge?

I think that members of the Church of Jesus Christ sometimes use the word "testimony" in a way that is less helpful than we think.  We talk about a "testimony" as if it's a thing we carry around with us.  In scripture, I don't think I've ever found that kind of usage.  Rather, what we refer to as a "testimony" is known simply as either faith or knowledge.

What is a testimony?  It is the act of testifying--of speaking or otherwise sharing what we know through personal experience.  This is the meaning both in law and in scripture.  Rather than being a thing to be possessed, it is an action.

When someone gives you a reprimand, do you "have a reprimand"?  When God gives us a testimony of some truth, what we have as a result is greater faith and knowledge.

Rather than saying, "I have a testimony of X," when we say, "I know X", the very action of saying such a thing is our testimony.  Rather than stating that someone's "testimony" isn't as strong as it used to be, is it not much more direct to say that their faith is less strong than it was?  If they're not sharing their faith and knowledge with others, at least intermittently, then by definition, it isn't a testimony.

I don't think the saints' common usage is evil, but I do think it is harder for people to understand, whether they're outside or inside the Church.  Though it may sound paradoxical to suggest, it's better for us to refer to a testimony as what is given, rather than something that is possessed.

Here's what scripture tells us: Peter encouraged us to "grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ."  (2 Peter 3:18)  In a revelation given through Joseph Smith, we were similarly told, "ye must grow in grace and in the knowledge of the truth." (Doctrine and Covenants 50:40)  Helaman related that "the Lamanites began to grow exceedingly in the knowledge of their God".  (Helaman 6:34)  King Benjamin said that as we remember God's greatness and humble ourselves before Him, "ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him that created you, or in the knowledge of that which is just and true."  (Mosiah 4:12)  In Alma 32, Alma used a great parable to teach that as we nourish the word of God in ourselves, as it grows, out faith will increase and become knowledge.

According to Alma, sometimes our faith, in some respects, becomes "dormant" as we gain knowledge.  But even as our knowledge increases, we must continue to increase in faith, because faith includes action; through faith we demonstrate that knowledge of truth really means something in our lives.

I don't mean to be too condemning; the common usage of "testimony" as a noun that suggests something that can be possessed appears even in the current temple recommend interview questions.  But I do think there's a better way to express truth.

Last thoughts for now:

I hope that my testimony to others is powerful; that is to say, I hope that I am able to testify powerfully through the power of the Holy Ghost, who will testify with me as I speak truth.  I also hope that my faith and knowledge will continue to grow, year by year.  I hope that when I speak of any of that, those around me will understand with clarity.

A Short Series on Love

I have had several thoughts related to love bouncing around in my head for some time now, and I’ve wanted to add them to my blog here.  Thus, in the posts that follow, here’s a short series about the meaning and impact of the ideas encompassed in that simple, four-letter word.

One Message for the Entire World

My wife has an embroidery machine and makes good use of it.  While I was attending graduate school for my Master's degree, I generally carried my computer with me in a briefcase-style black, fabric bag that had a flap at the top of one side that is roughly four inches wide.  At some point I determined that I wanted my wide to embroider a message on it; this message would be visible to everyone as I walked from place to place, as I sat doing homework, as I waited for the bus, as I sat on the bus, and essentially as I did anything else.

I had pondered something: If I had an opportunity to say one thing to anyone I met, or to the entire world all at once, what should I say?  This embroidered message would serve as well as any to communicate with the world, especially given that I would never have a chance to actually speak with many people who saw me (perhaps driving by in a vehicle or merely being part of a large group that I would have no reason to address verbally).  What message would be the most important?  In accordance with principles of good marketing (I assume, given that I'm not a true student of marketing), any message must be short to get and hold people's attention for the duration of the message.  In any event there was only so much space on the flap where the message was to be put.  So, I needed something that was, as the pithy expression goes, “short and sweet”.  And in a world where so many ideas are promoted and so many of them are misguided or simply false, I wanted my message to echo core a truth.

If the world is to know one thing, there are perhaps several candidates, including the knowledge that we are all children of God.  More specifically, we are children of an all-loving God.  His love is manifest the most in the existence of our Savior, Jesus Christ (see John 3:16).  As a follower of Jesus Christ, I have promised something: “...the second [great commandment] is ... Thou shalt love thy neighbour” (Matthew 22:39), and my “neighbor” is everyone else on the earth.

I want to be a good brother to God’s children and a good disciple of Christ, so, I chose my message and my wife placed it on the flap of my bag:

I love you.

I chose a simple, light-blue font that I hoped would be visible from quite a distance.  And I carried that message about, from day to day, visible to anyone and everyone.

The prospect of giving even one person such a potentially powerful and intimate message can be daunting, and surely, despite all of my best efforts, I do not always succeed in showing love as I ought to.  But as I carried my case and message, it struck me that I really was giving people a promise, and it was no small promise.  It’s easy to say, “I will love everyone,” when we’re in a small room occupied by only a few people we already like.  It’s easy to say, “I will love the entire world,” when we don’t have to and in any practical sense cannot demonstrate it.  It was something else to physically carry that message and promise to hundreds and thousands of people, most of whom I wouldn’t even be able to see or acknowledge, either at all or perhaps for only a few seconds in passing.

In giving anyone and everyone that message, I potentially exposed myself to ridicule, but a far greater concern to me was that anyone I saw could call me out on the promise.  Anyone could say, “Prove it!” and to be true to myself, to them, and to God, I would have to really act and speak in accordance with the words I was professing.  I was highly conscious of this.  I knew that if I were to say it, I would have to live it.  And I was willing, because it really is crucial for a disciple of Christ.

Realistically, I didn’t expect that “calling out” and proving to happen often.  In practice, only two people ever commented verbally to me about the message, and in both cases I was caught off guard and I failed to clarify that it was my message to the world, as opposed to my wife’s message to me.  In a funny sort of way, it wasn’t immediately easy to speak about.  I think that if I had the opportunity again, it would now be easier for me to say that yes, I love you, and even if I do so imperfectly I’m determined to do so truly.

While almost no one ever spoke to me about the message, I know that many people saw it.  I think that it brought a smile to some.  Perhaps it caused some people to ponder.  I have to assume that it was also offensive in a way to some, though I certainly couldn’t feel bad about that.  I wonder if, maybe, there might have been people who saw it who really needed to receive that message from someone.  Did I pass anyone who was feeling alone in the world, who felt less so for seeing me?  Was there anyone in the lower depths of despair, perhaps even suicidal, who rose a bit higher for knowing that at least one person out there loved them?  I don’t know.  I hope that my message was felt and helped people.

I later heard mention of a bus driver who had a habit of announcing over the P.A. system that, “Even if no one else loves you, I love you,” and I was both touched by the overtness and glad that I had chosen my message.

When I decided to leave a final message in my social media profile, I was able to make it longer, but I began and ended with a slightly longer version of those same words: I love you.

Last thoughts for now:

I love you.  I promise to show it.  I will fail in that promise at times, but I believe that there are few things more important that I can say or show, so I will do what I can to say it and show it.

Not “But”; Rather, “And”

People use and misuse the word “love” quite a bit, and there are a great many related thoughts.  It’s easily one of the most common themes in poetry and song.  Among those related thoughts are some related to homosexuality; some people are attracted to others of the same sex, and some people act physically according to those desires, and the word “love” is often used in conjunction with either.  Conversely, members of the restored Church of Jesus Christ are taught to show love to others but are also taught principles about sexual morality that do not align with common ideas about homosexuality.

Sometimes groups of people argue about it.  Some say, “If you love me, you must accept me as I am, and in turn, you must accept what I do,” even though they are actively promoting behavior and ideas that are contrary to God’s will.  In turn, I have many times heard or seen the statement that as disciples of Christ, we are to “love the sinner but hate the sin.”

That doesn’t always sit quite right with me.  In a sense, it’s true, and it’s essentially in accordance with what God has said in scripture, but hatred is seemingly opposed to what God is all about.  John (in John 4:8, 16) repeated a short but very strong statement: “God is love.”  (Emphasis added.)

If love is so central to godliness, ought we to use the theme of “love sinners but hate sin”?  Is there a better message to send, and one that is less able to be misinterpreted or twisted into a message of hatred?

Yes, there is.  President Dalling H. Oaks highlighted it in a general conference address in October 2019.  The better expression is simply this: Love God, and love everyone else.  Love God first and foremost.

These ideas were taught by the Savior Himself.  He was asked what the greatest (or most important) commandment was.  In Matthew 22:37–39, He answered, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.  This is the first and great commandment.  And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.”

President Oaks cautioned that, “our zeal to keep this second commandment must not cause us to forget the first”.  Indeed, the Savior’s response was about a question of a single, greatest commandment, and He only somewhat incidentally chose to speak of the second.  President Oaks’ strong implication was that, although we may naturally feel love and affection for some people, it is more important for us to follow that first and greatest commandment than it is for us to do anything related to the second.  It is most important for us to show love for God by seeking to know and do His will.  As the Savior said, “If ye love me, keep my commandments.”  (John 14:15)

So rather than using the expression “love the sinner but hate the sin”, perhaps we should instead use one that has a clear focus on only love: “Love God, and then love everyone else.”

Last thoughts for now:

As I’ve said before, I can make no claim to love others perfectly, but I know that determining to show that love is an essential part of being a disciple of Christ.  I hope to live in such a way that demonstrates my love of God and others.  I hope for that love to grow and be real.

Infinite Love; Infinite Pain

Loving other people opens our hearts not only to joy but also to pain.  I think we all learn this lesson multiple times in life.  I’ve learned it when being rejected by a fiancée, when seeing people I care about turn away from the Church of Jesus Christ, when family members are insensitive or deliberately distant, when I’ve given something of myself or something else I value but the gift was rejected, and in many smaller cases.  Prophets feel this pain for the sorrow of the world.

Does infinite love mean being potentially infinitely hurt?  The Savior loves us and certainly has felt pain for us.  He felt infinite pain during His infinite Atonement for us; perhaps the depth of that pain was really possible because of His infinite love for us.

Last thoughts for now:

I don’t think I have particularly deep conclusions about this, but I think that as we grow in love, we also, in a sense, grow in our capacity to be hurt.  Yet, I think that as we grow in love and thus become more like God the Father and Jesus Christ, we also gain more of an eternal perspective that helps frame that pain in the context of eternity.  God wouldn’t have given us His plan if the joy wasn’t worth all the pain.  I expect to be hurt at times, but it’s okay.