When singing special musical numbers during sacrament meetings, I am always wary; I want to make sure the focus of the meeting is on Christ and His Gospel, and not on people's musical ability. That being said, my family apparently received many, many compliments last Sunday after six of us sang "Sleep, Little Jesus" together.
I had a couple of coughing children to take home, so I was able to dodge the acclaim. And I don't know how much we succeeded in inviting the Holy Ghost more than showing off singing ability; that's hard to tell. But apparently we sang very well. People told my wife more than once that day that they love it when our family sings.
What makes that kind of singing possible? Sure, my wife and I are musically competent, though very far from being as skilled as a professional. We're not wealthy enough for personal vocal instruction for the kids, though we have been able to get some piano lessons for them. We definitely did some practicing throughout the week, but the kids have enough musical ability already that we can put together a decent song as a group. What has brought that about?
If our family being able to sing together is a "great thing", then I think what makes it possible is one of those "small and simple things" (Alma 37:6). Specifically, we sing together (almost) every night as part of our Family Time tradition I wrote about previously. Each night we sing a hymn or a children's song--just one song, usually. Over the years, that little bit of continual practice must have had an effect. My wife considers us to finally be in the "reward" period, where we get to really enjoy singing together with the children, after years of small efforts.
But that daily singing is the least important part of our Family Time tradition. While I believe music is important, the more important counsel we're trying to follow is the daily family scripture study and prayer. If daily singing slowly builds our musical ability so that now we can rejoice in the "great thing" of family musical numbers, what great things will come from our small and simple daily scripture study and prayer?
I'm not sure what those great things will be, but I do believe Alma's words that, "by small and simple things are great things brought to pass". As I said last time, I think that this simple nightly tradition is the most important thing I do, and I believe that it really will bless my children.
Last thoughts for now:
Daily scripture study and prayer are "small and simple things"; we have promises from the Creator of the Universe that they will bring about great things. Perhaps the great thing they will bring is a solid faith in Christ that will guide my children throughout their lives. Maybe it will be the traditions that they carry on with their own families. Maybe it will include greater ability to meaningfully ponder God's word and to converse with others about it. Maybe it will be all of that and more.
Showing posts with label tradition. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tradition. Show all posts
Friday, December 16, 2022
The Great Things I Hope For
Monday, June 6, 2022
The Most Important Thing I Do
A while back, I was sitting in on a class held for United States Military Academy cadets by the Church Educational System's Institute of Religion. I don't remember what the lesson was that evening, but at some point I was thinking about my family's nightly Family Time tradition. I wrote a post about this back in October 2013, and we still do largely the same thing almost every night. Essentially, we sing together, we study scripture together, and we pray together. Recently, we've also often been reviewing personal goals, and of course, we have an extended Home Evening with a lesson, which we now have on Sundays, following a suggestion from Elder Cook of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles in the October 2018 general conference. It may seem a simple thing for me, my wife, and my children to take a few minutes for reverence and devotion to God, but as I sat in the Institute class, somehow the thought came to me that Family Time is the most important thing I do.
I hadn't really considered it like that before. Of course, I know it has been important to me, or I wouldn't have kept up such a tradition for so long. But when I think about the real, lasting impact of everything I do in life, I don't think anything else will be more important than this simple tradition. Through it, we're able to learn together and grow spiritually; we're able to provide our children with the knowledge they need to navigate through the trials and confusion of life. Through it, we find greater unity as a family. Through it, we remind ourselves daily of how to live as disciples of Christ.
I do other good things in life, whether in Church service, at work, other activities with my family, or just by taking advantage of opportunities when they arise at random, but I don't think the real, lasting impact approaches what I achieve through daily singing, scripture study, and prayer with my family.
It was fascinating to consider. In the days that have followed, I haven't changed my mind.
Last thoughts for now:
Someday my family will start shrinking as my adult children move out and begin their own lives. Eventually, we presumably won't have any children remaining at home. Family Time will be a bit different then as we don't have any children to teach. In one sense, I think I will have a feeling of, "Mission Accomplished" when that day comes. I expect that my wife and I will carry on the tradition, but simply focus more on what interests the two of us. I hope that our children will have similar traditions with their future spouses and children, and I expect that my wife and I will want to join our children's family traditions when possible. For now, I happily carry on the event each night. I love it. And I truly believe that it's the most important thing I do.
Sunday, October 20, 2013
Fisher Family Traditions: Family Time
I've always found it important to re-evaluate the way we do things and make changes as necessary (which should be normal, really, if we're repenting as we should). However, when we think we've got a good idea we tend to want to hold onto it. One of our favorite family traditions is something call Family Time.
Family Time is a lot like Family Home Evening, except that it's simpler and we do it every day. In the Church we've repeatedly been counseled to pray together daily as a family and to read scriptures together daily. We've also been counseled that music invites the Holy Ghost. These things are the foundation of Family Time.
A while back we also picked up a part I called "gathering". With that added in, here's how our tradition goes before the kids' bedtime:
Gathering consists of tidying up the living room (which helps Mama to keep the house clean) and then sitting reverently while I play some music on the piano (generally from the Children's Songbook). I explain to the kids that when we're reverent, we listen to the Holy Ghost, and I sometimes ask what the Holy Ghost told them. I figure that by practicing reverence at home, the kids will be better at being reverent at church and at other appropriate times.
After gathering, we sing a song together. For now this is usually from the Children's Songbook instead of the Hymnal. Sometimes we sing a song that we don't know well, and occasionally one that none of us has even heard before. If we need to, one of the parents speaks a line of the lyrics before we sing them. We then read several verses of scripture. The passage could be as short as two verses (not very often at all) or even a whole chapter (also not very often), though usually it's closer to five or six verses. The length of the passage is not really important; mostly we want to talk about whatever idea or ideas are contained in the given passage. We've been reading the Book of Mormon from the beginning, and after a few years we're almost through 3 Nephi. We give everyone a chance to "read"; the younger kids repeat back the words of a verse as a parent reads them. (At one point our three-year old displayed some unwillingness to participate; we used his natural sense of possessiveness to our advantage. We ask, "Who gets to read Marshall's verse?" to which he happily raises his hand and says, "Me!" It works almost without fail.) As the kids participate this way they're also practicing their skills with either reading or memory. Depending on what the passage, we might even act out what we've read so that the kids can better understand. After we've read scripture we pray. For this prayer we kneel in a circle, and lately we've taken to also holding hands as well.
We try to keep up the tradition even when it's not convenient, such as when travelling. We've even had Family Time in the van. Sometimes we cut it a little bit short if necessary, though I'm always wary of selling ourselves short. The kids are accustomed to it and prod us as well. When we've wanted to keep it short by just having a family prayer, our sweet little three-year-old reminds us that we "forgot to read scriptures". Because of his encouragement, I've made sure to make the effort to read together even if it's late.
When we get the opportunity, we invite others to participate in our Family Time. It's a treat for us, and it provides a missionary experience as well when our guests are not members of the Church. I think it's one of the best ways to bring the Holy Ghost to people.
And, on Mondays, we have Family Home evening, which at a minimum also includes an opening prayer and a lesson but often also involves testimonies, an activity, and a treat.
Last thoughts for now:
Family Time is a wonderful tradition for us. I know that our family and our individual children are strengthened because of it. The kids expect it, and while we still need a lot of practice being reverent, they're learning a bit every day. I'm grateful for the counsel of living prophets and am glad that we've found a good tradition by which we can obey that counsel.
Family Time is a lot like Family Home Evening, except that it's simpler and we do it every day. In the Church we've repeatedly been counseled to pray together daily as a family and to read scriptures together daily. We've also been counseled that music invites the Holy Ghost. These things are the foundation of Family Time.
A while back we also picked up a part I called "gathering". With that added in, here's how our tradition goes before the kids' bedtime:
Gathering consists of tidying up the living room (which helps Mama to keep the house clean) and then sitting reverently while I play some music on the piano (generally from the Children's Songbook). I explain to the kids that when we're reverent, we listen to the Holy Ghost, and I sometimes ask what the Holy Ghost told them. I figure that by practicing reverence at home, the kids will be better at being reverent at church and at other appropriate times.
After gathering, we sing a song together. For now this is usually from the Children's Songbook instead of the Hymnal. Sometimes we sing a song that we don't know well, and occasionally one that none of us has even heard before. If we need to, one of the parents speaks a line of the lyrics before we sing them. We then read several verses of scripture. The passage could be as short as two verses (not very often at all) or even a whole chapter (also not very often), though usually it's closer to five or six verses. The length of the passage is not really important; mostly we want to talk about whatever idea or ideas are contained in the given passage. We've been reading the Book of Mormon from the beginning, and after a few years we're almost through 3 Nephi. We give everyone a chance to "read"; the younger kids repeat back the words of a verse as a parent reads them. (At one point our three-year old displayed some unwillingness to participate; we used his natural sense of possessiveness to our advantage. We ask, "Who gets to read Marshall's verse?" to which he happily raises his hand and says, "Me!" It works almost without fail.) As the kids participate this way they're also practicing their skills with either reading or memory. Depending on what the passage, we might even act out what we've read so that the kids can better understand. After we've read scripture we pray. For this prayer we kneel in a circle, and lately we've taken to also holding hands as well.
We try to keep up the tradition even when it's not convenient, such as when travelling. We've even had Family Time in the van. Sometimes we cut it a little bit short if necessary, though I'm always wary of selling ourselves short. The kids are accustomed to it and prod us as well. When we've wanted to keep it short by just having a family prayer, our sweet little three-year-old reminds us that we "forgot to read scriptures". Because of his encouragement, I've made sure to make the effort to read together even if it's late.
When we get the opportunity, we invite others to participate in our Family Time. It's a treat for us, and it provides a missionary experience as well when our guests are not members of the Church. I think it's one of the best ways to bring the Holy Ghost to people.
And, on Mondays, we have Family Home evening, which at a minimum also includes an opening prayer and a lesson but often also involves testimonies, an activity, and a treat.
Last thoughts for now:
Family Time is a wonderful tradition for us. I know that our family and our individual children are strengthened because of it. The kids expect it, and while we still need a lot of practice being reverent, they're learning a bit every day. I'm grateful for the counsel of living prophets and am glad that we've found a good tradition by which we can obey that counsel.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
What Christmas Should Be About
(Note: I started writing this before Christmas but never finished until now.)
I was in a bookstore recently and while passing through the children's section I saw a large wall, centrally located, that was dedicated to Christmas-themed books. I was struck by the fact that the books, toys, and and other items on the wall universally lacked one crucial element of Christmas. The one truly important part of Christmas was completely absent from the wall.
Understanding that this is one of those times that I'm going to be disagreeing with most of the world again, here is what should not be the focus of Christmas:
1. Christmas should not be about a fictitious flying fat man in red who encourages greed. It should not be about mythical elves and reindeer. These are distractions that help a soda company to sell its product but that don't really enrich or inspire us.
2. Christmas should not be about sleigh bells, trees, chestnuts, romance, or any number of other things people sing about in "Christmas" tunes. These things are mostly harmless and can be parts of fun traditions for the season, but they're ancillary appendages with the potential, like the fat guy, to distract us and our children. (We have enjoyed Christmas trees every year, though I was recently shown a passage at the beginning of Jeremiah 10 that seems to condemn the practice. I'd have to study context more to be sure.)
3. People sometimes say that Christmas is about "learning that it's better to give than to receive". That statement is true, and Christmas is as good a time as any to experience the goodness of giving to others, but I think that under the surface most people support giving because necessarily, receiving occurs along with giving, and if everybody is engaged in the act of giving everybody is also receiving. Net result: we get spoiled with a lot of presents. Christmas should not be about giving or receiving gifts, even if we engage in either or both.
4. People also say that Christmas is about peace, love, and kindness. To me, this is like saying that a hamburger is about mustard and ketchup, or that Mondays at work are about work. Peace, love, and kindness only have meaning in that in showing these qualities we emulate our Savior who, through His Atonement, gave us hope, because without him, all of our positive thoughts, feelings, and actions would have been meaningless as we would be eternally lost (see 2 Nephi 9:7-10 and the rest of the chapter). Also, while December is a great month for peace, love, and kindness, so is every other month, too.
What should Christmas be about? Christmas should be the celebration of the birth of a man who came into the world to teach us, live for us, suffer for us, die for us, and intercede at the judgment bar of God for us. We refer to this man as the Christ.
So those of us who care about our religion wonder how we can stay focused on what is important. Often we try to come up with some sort of Christ-centered activity in addition to our regular traditions such as gift-giving, but in these cases I question whether or not we're really focusing ourselves on Jesus Christ. Even as we include such an activity, people tend to look forward to other parts of our holiday (a word derived from the words "holy day"; that's what it ought to be if it's about Jesus Christ). Kids invariably look forward most to opening presents, others look forward to the same thing or any of the other things mentioned above.
If it's what we're looking forward to the most, it's what we're focused on, and I'm quite sure that no one is thinking about Christ while pulling apart pretty wrapping paper to see what toy or treat they get.
Matthew 6:20-21 "But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."
Where is our heart at Christmastime?
An Army major I know (a concerned Christian man, who showed me the Jeremiah passage above), determined with his wife a few years ago that his family would not celebrate Christmas at all. I wonder if we're wrong to do so many distracting things in the name of Christmas, and thus in the name of Christ. Are we thus taking our Lord's name in vain (Exodus 20:7)?
Do our Christmas traditions deserve reconsideration?
Last thoughts for now:
My wife and I keep re-evaluating our Christmas traditions (and Easter, too, for that matter). I think I want to severely de-emphasize the gift-giving, and maybe even get rid of it altogether or move it to another day. I like to give my wife gifts (and the kids, too, though they have lots of toys already), but I don't want our Christmas to be about gifts. We like our kids' re-enactment of the Nativity each Christmas Eve, and I think I like the idea of spending time together on Christmas and reading or singing about Christ every hour. While I'm still figuring out all of that, I know that I want to keep some traditional stuff away. I don't want to lose my focus on Christ.
I was in a bookstore recently and while passing through the children's section I saw a large wall, centrally located, that was dedicated to Christmas-themed books. I was struck by the fact that the books, toys, and and other items on the wall universally lacked one crucial element of Christmas. The one truly important part of Christmas was completely absent from the wall.
Understanding that this is one of those times that I'm going to be disagreeing with most of the world again, here is what should not be the focus of Christmas:
1. Christmas should not be about a fictitious flying fat man in red who encourages greed. It should not be about mythical elves and reindeer. These are distractions that help a soda company to sell its product but that don't really enrich or inspire us.
2. Christmas should not be about sleigh bells, trees, chestnuts, romance, or any number of other things people sing about in "Christmas" tunes. These things are mostly harmless and can be parts of fun traditions for the season, but they're ancillary appendages with the potential, like the fat guy, to distract us and our children. (We have enjoyed Christmas trees every year, though I was recently shown a passage at the beginning of Jeremiah 10 that seems to condemn the practice. I'd have to study context more to be sure.)
3. People sometimes say that Christmas is about "learning that it's better to give than to receive". That statement is true, and Christmas is as good a time as any to experience the goodness of giving to others, but I think that under the surface most people support giving because necessarily, receiving occurs along with giving, and if everybody is engaged in the act of giving everybody is also receiving. Net result: we get spoiled with a lot of presents. Christmas should not be about giving or receiving gifts, even if we engage in either or both.
4. People also say that Christmas is about peace, love, and kindness. To me, this is like saying that a hamburger is about mustard and ketchup, or that Mondays at work are about work. Peace, love, and kindness only have meaning in that in showing these qualities we emulate our Savior who, through His Atonement, gave us hope, because without him, all of our positive thoughts, feelings, and actions would have been meaningless as we would be eternally lost (see 2 Nephi 9:7-10 and the rest of the chapter). Also, while December is a great month for peace, love, and kindness, so is every other month, too.
What should Christmas be about? Christmas should be the celebration of the birth of a man who came into the world to teach us, live for us, suffer for us, die for us, and intercede at the judgment bar of God for us. We refer to this man as the Christ.
So those of us who care about our religion wonder how we can stay focused on what is important. Often we try to come up with some sort of Christ-centered activity in addition to our regular traditions such as gift-giving, but in these cases I question whether or not we're really focusing ourselves on Jesus Christ. Even as we include such an activity, people tend to look forward to other parts of our holiday (a word derived from the words "holy day"; that's what it ought to be if it's about Jesus Christ). Kids invariably look forward most to opening presents, others look forward to the same thing or any of the other things mentioned above.
If it's what we're looking forward to the most, it's what we're focused on, and I'm quite sure that no one is thinking about Christ while pulling apart pretty wrapping paper to see what toy or treat they get.
Matthew 6:20-21 "But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."
Where is our heart at Christmastime?
An Army major I know (a concerned Christian man, who showed me the Jeremiah passage above), determined with his wife a few years ago that his family would not celebrate Christmas at all. I wonder if we're wrong to do so many distracting things in the name of Christmas, and thus in the name of Christ. Are we thus taking our Lord's name in vain (Exodus 20:7)?
Do our Christmas traditions deserve reconsideration?
Last thoughts for now:
My wife and I keep re-evaluating our Christmas traditions (and Easter, too, for that matter). I think I want to severely de-emphasize the gift-giving, and maybe even get rid of it altogether or move it to another day. I like to give my wife gifts (and the kids, too, though they have lots of toys already), but I don't want our Christmas to be about gifts. We like our kids' re-enactment of the Nativity each Christmas Eve, and I think I like the idea of spending time together on Christmas and reading or singing about Christ every hour. While I'm still figuring out all of that, I know that I want to keep some traditional stuff away. I don't want to lose my focus on Christ.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Exact Words
Some members of the Church have a certain tradition or habit that really isn't necessary, and that I consequently avoid. When blessing a baby and giving him or her a name, I often hear the wording like this: "and to give him a name by which he will be known on the records of the Church." It's simply not dictated by any Church book of instructions. It doesn't hurt, but I don't want to confuse things that are necessary and things that aren't, so I never use those words. And I hope that people notice it and realize that they don't need to use them either. That way we can focus on the traditions and elements of ordinances which are truly important and necessary.
Much of the time, priesthood ordinances do not use exact wording. Any holder of the Melchizedek Priesthood, when reading the instructions for ordinances, will find key elements but rarely exact words.
But sometimes exact wording is important. Temple ordinances, for example, use exact wording. One thing I wonder is, other than the fact that the words have been prescribed for us, are the exact words absolutely necessary? Perhaps not, and we know that temple ordinances have changed at times, but there are good reasons for using specific words. A major reason is that there is much to learn from what is said during those ordinances.
Outside of the temple, I can think of two occasions when exact wording is dictated by scripture (in Doctrine and Covenants Section 20 and also in the book of Moroni): during a baptism, and when we renew our baptismal covenants with the sacrament. Why do we use exact words then? Is it because those exact words are necessary for the ordinance? It seems clear that such is not the case when we review the wording used by Alma as he baptized Helam and others: "Helam, I baptize thee, having authority from the Almighty God, as a testimony that ye have entered into a covenant to serve him until you are dead as to the mortal body; and may the Spirit of the Lord be poured out upon you; and may he grant unto you eternal life, through the redemption of Christ, whom he has prepared from the foundation of the world."
I think along with the advantage of learning from specific wording comes the advantage of not having to think through it on the spot--we don't have to figure out what to say every week during the sacrament. What seems to be the most important reason to me, however, is that by using the same words every time we don't distract ourselves from the ordinance itself. Too often during regular prayers, the speaker turns to flowery and profuse speech. If the person performing the baptism or blessing the sacrament wanted to "make it good", they could easily get lost in language that didn't really add to the ordinance at all. Some people would even be tempted to praise the speaker, again being distracted from the ordinance itself. The exact wording provides simplicity and focus when that is exactly what is needed as we make and renew covenants with God.
Last thoughts for now:
Making and keeping covenants with our Heavenly Father will bring us back to live with Him. Sometimes, exactness and precision is required so that we can be most fully blessed. I want to be precise when such precision is warranted, to keep learning throughout my life, and to stay focused on the simplicity of essential ordinances and covenants.
Much of the time, priesthood ordinances do not use exact wording. Any holder of the Melchizedek Priesthood, when reading the instructions for ordinances, will find key elements but rarely exact words.
But sometimes exact wording is important. Temple ordinances, for example, use exact wording. One thing I wonder is, other than the fact that the words have been prescribed for us, are the exact words absolutely necessary? Perhaps not, and we know that temple ordinances have changed at times, but there are good reasons for using specific words. A major reason is that there is much to learn from what is said during those ordinances.
Outside of the temple, I can think of two occasions when exact wording is dictated by scripture (in Doctrine and Covenants Section 20 and also in the book of Moroni): during a baptism, and when we renew our baptismal covenants with the sacrament. Why do we use exact words then? Is it because those exact words are necessary for the ordinance? It seems clear that such is not the case when we review the wording used by Alma as he baptized Helam and others: "Helam, I baptize thee, having authority from the Almighty God, as a testimony that ye have entered into a covenant to serve him until you are dead as to the mortal body; and may the Spirit of the Lord be poured out upon you; and may he grant unto you eternal life, through the redemption of Christ, whom he has prepared from the foundation of the world."
I think along with the advantage of learning from specific wording comes the advantage of not having to think through it on the spot--we don't have to figure out what to say every week during the sacrament. What seems to be the most important reason to me, however, is that by using the same words every time we don't distract ourselves from the ordinance itself. Too often during regular prayers, the speaker turns to flowery and profuse speech. If the person performing the baptism or blessing the sacrament wanted to "make it good", they could easily get lost in language that didn't really add to the ordinance at all. Some people would even be tempted to praise the speaker, again being distracted from the ordinance itself. The exact wording provides simplicity and focus when that is exactly what is needed as we make and renew covenants with God.
Last thoughts for now:
Making and keeping covenants with our Heavenly Father will bring us back to live with Him. Sometimes, exactness and precision is required so that we can be most fully blessed. I want to be precise when such precision is warranted, to keep learning throughout my life, and to stay focused on the simplicity of essential ordinances and covenants.
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